Kids’
stuff is pretty fashionable right now. In clothes there’s fun prints and pop
socks (even with sandals, shock horror!); in entertainment, all the classic
children’s TV is being re-made (The Magic Roundabout, the Clangers); and even
in food, we have cupcakes and cake pops absolutely EVERYWHERE. Is there
anything wrong with all this?
Some
people are highly suspicious of it all, and I can sort of see why. There’s two
main criticisms I've heard around the place (can’t remember where; they’re
just, you know, in the air): 1) It’s just escapism because the country has been
in recession for years, and we shouldn't give in to it, but instead should face
up to the harsh realities of our lives, and 2) It’s feeding into some latent
paedophilia, and that’s obviously horrific, so we shouldn't go there. I’ll deal
with number 2 first, because now I’ve mentioned the “p” word, no-one will be
calm enough to think about number 1 until 2 is done with.
This
is most often a worry with things like “school disco” events at clubs, or very
sexualised clothing that’s also somehow childlike. And maybe in some of those
cases, people complaining about this are on to something. Adult school discos
are meat-markets, and that’s inappropriate. But that doesn’t mean the objection
applies across the board, and that eating a cupcake, or wearing a dress with
kittens on it, or whatever, is in any way suspect. And in any case, there’s
something of victim-blaming about suggesting that the problem is with the
person wearing particular clothes, or eating particular food. You can bet
they’re not doing it with the aim of seducing a paedophile. If someone finds
them attractive on grounds of childlikeness, then that person is the one with
the problem, not their target.
The
reason they’re probably wearing / eating whatever it is, far from a warped
attempt at sexiness, is because it’s fun. And I think it’s because it’s fun
that you see cupcakes on sale at burlesque nights, and sexy clothes that are
also cutesy. We’re combining multiple types of fun, some of which are adult,
and some of which are childish. There are bad ways of associating those two
things, so it’s not unproblematic, but by and large it’s the people making the
associations who have the problem. So I think school disco bad, cupcakes
absolutely fine, other stuff perhaps somewhere in the middle. But we can debate
about whether the stuff in the middle crosses a line without getting hysterical
and tarring everything with the same horrific brush, because some of it is
definitely innocent.
Fun
brings me to issue number 1 – that people only like this stuff because it’s
escapist, and we should all live in the real world. It might be right that it’s
largely escapist. People who say this are on to something I think, when they
point out that it’s no coincidence all this has become fashionable during times
of hardship. Where they’re wrong though, is in thinking there’s anything wrong
with that. Escapism is an essential ingredient in a healthy life. Without it
we’d have a lot less art, a lot fewer dreams, and a much duller world. Of
course it can all go too far – if you’re sitting around watching The Magic
Roundabout in your pants all day because it’s easier than dealing with your
job, friends and family, then you’re overdoing the escaping. But then, if
you’re doing that, you probably need help rather than condemnation. We all use
things to help us escape – alcohol, holidays, a good film, sex, a trashy
magazine, a gym session – and it’s just as well too, or we’d all go mad.
So
both arguments come back to fun. I see no reason why children should have all
of it. We shouldn’t shoulder our adult martyrdom and refuse all joy. Some of
what made us happy as kids still can, and provided it doesn’t interfere with
other aspects of our lives, I don’t see the harm in indulging that. Children
are people, adults are people, we’re going to have some stuff in common,
including some fairly basic things that make us happy. We have to give up on
some of those things, or at least rein them in substantially, when we grow up,
but that’s because they get in the way of other responsibilities we now have.
You can’t spend all day on the swings when you have a mortgage to pay.
But
who went from that to saying that “grown-ups don’t go on the swings”, huh?
Fools. If it makes you happy, you have the time, and it’s not hurting anyone
(don’t take small kids’ turn in the playground), go on the swings! Why not? Put
away childish things to the time in your schedule when you can afford to
indulge them by all means, but don’t bury them entirely if they still bring you
joy. There’s no reason kids should have all the fun.
